I’m thankful for learning new things…

            I’m sitting in the guardroom at the pool with a few of the other male guards.  I’ve got my laptop out tapping away at the next dodo egg and they’re discussing girls.  “Girls” isn’t quite right – I meant girl. 

            One of the female lifeguards recently became engaged but her behavior hadn’t changed a bit.  She was still attending drinking parties and every Greek function she could.  She was still hanging out with “guy friends” with seemingly little different other than the diamond on her finger.  (Her fiancé is in Georgia.)

            One the guards looks at the other one and mumbles, “You can’t make a ho into a house wife.”

            Huh…never thought about it before but I guess they’re right

I’m thankful that Mrs. Teply isn’t a ho… (that’s right I’m brave enough to put the words in the same sentence!)

            Long before we started dating, Mrs. T and I shared a friendship.  One day I overheard her talking about her new boyfriend (the second boyfriend in three months – wild!).  For reasons known only to the gods of stupidity, I thought it would be funny to call her a “floozy” (I know – wild.)

            Anyway, she became angry and slapped me.  Now, slapping someone in that situation isn’t proof of anything but it is sure a strong opening statement.  Take it from me – she was NOT a ho, floozy, vixen, or anything of the sort.

I’m thankful Mrs. Teply is Mrs. Teply…

            When I was a young man, I didn’t know what I needed in a good woman.  I was more interested in things like hair color, athleticism, size of mother’s rear, and things like that.   I knew a few things to look for but what makes a woman truly valuable was beyond me.

            The truth is -even when I was dating Mrs. Teply – I really wasn’t concerned about the shape of virtuous woman’s soul just her shape. 

            Only years later, have I discovered the wonderful qualities I have in Mrs. T.  I have absolute faith in her discretion, spending, ethic, and everything besides.  I wasn’t looking for it at the time – I was ignorant.  It’s a little like finding a five-dollar bill in a pair of pants but in my case, it’s a one hundred dollar bill.

Author: Phantaveous Ghast

I'd rather teach giant roaches to do circus tricks on a street corner in Haiti than wear a pair of skinny jeans.

287 thoughts on “Thankfulness”

  1. “You can’t make a ho into a house wife.” hahahaha… Thats funny. Maybe rappers are smarter than they look or sound.

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